Things I Like

Pearl and Daisy

I decided to compile a list of “things I like.” Not normal, boring crap. Like, unique stuff. Things that find interesting, intriguing and likable. A little glimpse into my brain, I guess.

  1. The smell of Fall when it first arrives, the crisp cool evenings and chilly air.
  2. Sunrises over the buildings in San Francisco
  3. Slow, early weekend mornings at my apartment: all is quiet in my neighborhood, the fire-escape door is open, curtains are drawn back and I can sip my coffee while journaling or on my computer.
  4. The chills and goosebumps I get while listening to show tunes and Broadway musicals on my iPod.
  5. Singing and dancing to said show tunes and musicals.
  6. Performing. Auditions, rehearsals, tech week, the final performance…all fill me with an indescribable passion that nothing else in my life has ever matched.
  7. Allowing myself to do nothing. And being ok with that.
  8. Dreaming of a life with my soulmate…who will be a Simon Baker look-alike. LOL
  9. The smell and taste of pumpkin flavored everything.
  10. Coffee and scones with my mom at The Blue Mug in Escondido.
  11. Late-night political/societal chats with my dad.
  12. Making people laugh
  13. The look on someone’s face when they have a light-bulb moment
  14. Dancing and singing in a bar or club with friends and having a moment where everything is perfect and wonderful
  15. Margaritas, chips and guacamole
  16. A good Tempranillo or Beaugolais
  17. Cosy, warm evenings with my family, especially during the holidays
  18. Spending time with Pearl every day, waking him up in the morning, kissing him good-bye, seeing him after a long day, scratching his neck before he goes to bed.
  19. Learning something new about myself. Self-discovery. Self-empowerment.
  20. Clearing old beliefs and patters
  21. Being able to identify your true, authentic voice and follow it
  22. Harry fucking Potter
  23. Ella Enchanted (the book, not the movie.)
  24. Hyperbole and a Half blog (one of the greatest blogs ever written)
  25. Notes from the Universe in my inbox every morning
  26. Spanish guitar music
  27. The magic that Sevilla, Spain holds over me.
  28. The beauty, energy and magic that happens when you travel to a new place and discover things you didn’t even know existed
  29. Pinning my dream home on Pinterest. I’ll be real. lol
  30. Those perfect days where you don’t even notice the temperature because it’s just so perfect.
  31. Writing something that impacts someone positively
  32. Memes and GIFs. I seriously pee in my pants from laughter sometimes. (Not really, but almost.)
  33. Trying local, unique coffee shops and cafes
  34. The smell of fresh mountain air and pine trees

….and that’s about it for now! :) I’ll keep adding to it.

What are some of your favorite things?

I write because…

Song inside you
I write because…
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“I want to be as vulnerable and raw as possible so people feel less alone. I want to make people happy or laugh, even if it’s at my own expense.” Alexi Wasser, from “I’m Boy Crazy,” excerpted from #GIRLBOSS
Song inside you
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There is a voice inside of me that needs to be shared. Openly, plainly, honestly and humorously. What is the point of hiding your voice? Be bold and share it with the world. Do good and good will come to you.
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Writing is also a way for me to find and understand my true, authentic voice. To help me follow my truth, my dreams and my heart.
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I’m especially excited to write at this point in my life because I’m going through a huge transition period. I am moving from San Francisco, where I’ve been the past year and a half, back to San Diego (my hometown) in December. I’m so happy with this decision. It was bittersweet to make, but it was so plainly and easily the right choice for me.
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I don’t have a job or an apartment yet but, as nerve-wracking as that is sometimes, it’s more exciting than anything. I have a completely new, blank chapter in front of me. One that I can completely write with my own unique voice and truth. One that I can design on my own. I have an outline and idea of what I want my life to be like and what I’ll be doing, but honestly…nothing is set in stone. I can do anything.
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Again, nerve-wracking and exciting at the same time ;)
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Expect funny, self-help and self-empowerment topics, personal adventures and stories, wisdom and my own musings on life and fulfilling our purpose. At the very least, I want to put a smile on your face, to make you laugh and feel familiarity.
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Lindsey Social Media ManagerI want to be an encouraging and supportive voice for any young person going through a transition period or who need a little inspiration and motivation to make things happen…things THEY want, dreams they want to achieve, adventures they want to pursue.
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I hope to grow a large, engaged, positive and hilariously badass audience. I love connecting with new people, so comment away!! I want my blog to be a platform for people to learn, connect, share with one another and feel they are in a supportive, safe environment.
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My goal is to write consistently and grow a strong community on this blog, but to also branch out into writing books, selling merchandise, guest posting, writing for magazines, hosting weekly podcasts and vlogs and speaking at events.
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Come along for the ride! :)

The Adventure Continues: Big Changes Ahead

View at the Chart House

As with all things in life, when one chapter closes, another one opens.

I’m moving back down to San Diego.

View at the Chart House

When I write the word “back,” I initially feel like I’m giving a sense of defeat…I’m moving “back” home because I couldn’t hack it here where I am in San Francisco. But that’s not the truth. And the truth is, I am moving back to San Diego. I grew up there and spent a year there after I graduated college.

The decision has been brewing for a while and this past week it was made official official. (As opposed to just “official.” lol) Official official because I told my boss on Thursday that I was leaving.

Pearl and Daisy

Pearl and Daisy are certainly coming along.

This was a really difficult conversation because I love, respect and care for my boss so much. I love my job at the clinic and it truly is my family and second home here in the city. But the conversation was fine, full of laughter, understanding and figuring out the next few steps for hiring another person, etc. I’m very fortunate that I can keep working remotely for them when I’m in SD. It’s work I love and I still get to stay in touch with some of my favorite people.

The movers have been hired and I’m still sitting in this space where the decision is really starting to hit me.

And I’m fucking excited. It’s bittersweet to leave a place I’ve been for the past year, say good-bye to my amazing community and work here, but the truth is, San Francisco just isn’t my city.

I could tell over the past couple months I needed a shift and change…but I didn’t know what it was. I was constantly vacillating between staying here and moving down to SD, getting another job (or part-time job) in SF to help financially, finding a job in SD and then moving down…but the indecision kept me caught in limbo. And it was starting to really stress me out. I would have these mini panic attacks, usually in the morning, and feel so overwhelmed with emotions I couldn’t even identify. I knew I needed to be decisive and then take action from there.

Cardiff By-the-Sea

View of the ocean on the 101 Highway, between Encinitas and Cardiff.

I had so many voices in my head about what I should do and what I was expected to do, that I had to take a step back from everything, identify my voice and what wanted from my life…not what other people suggested or wanted me to do. Or what I thought they wanted me to do.

About a month or so was spent journaling my heart out, meditating, conversations with my counselor and finally I gained more clarity. What did I want? It’s such a simple question, but one that makes you answer honestly and then…BAM. There’s your answer.

So what did I want? I wanted to move to San Diego. By the end of the year. Job or no job.

Ok then. Let’s do it.

So much ease, relief, happiness and calm came once I made the decision. Sometimes the best thing we can do for ourselves is make a decision and then take action from there. Not take action based off indecision like I was trying to before (aka a half-assed job search in SF and SD).

I don’t have a job lined up in SD, I don’t have an apartment, but I don’t care. I have 5 weeks until I move down and a lot can happen during that time. I’ve seen my life completely change- job and city- within 30 days twice already. Five week? Psh. That’s an extra week ;)

I’m looking for jobs, but also looking into freelancing and social media management as much as I can. I really want time freedom to do things that fill me with passion and happiness. Travel, theatre, designing my days the way I want to. I currently have a few gigs, including working remotely for the clinic, that will sustain me financially…at least for now. (Eeeeek. lol)

Truth be told though, I really have no idea what I want to do. I’m continually getting down on myself for this, what I see as, lack of purpose, direction, drive and decision. I know exactly the kind of lifestyle I want, the things that make me filled with happiness and passion and laughter, what I want my life to look like…but right now there is a disconnect between what I’m doing presently and how to get to what and where I envision my life to be. But it’s so close I can almost taste it.

Sunset at Chart House, SDI know clarity will come with time and, as my counselor has told me countless times, I need to give myself the space to let that clarity come. It always does. And when I get clarity…holy shit man, I GO for it. Take action and make it happen in a very short amount of time.

But it’s not something I can force, I have to let it happen with natural and intuitive ease. So what I have to keep reminding myself to do in the interim is continue to take action and be productive in ways that feels natural and right and give myself the space for clarity to come. It always will. Stay true and connected to MY authentic voice and follow what I know is right for me.

In other words, focus on the “what” and “why” and not the how. Because, let’s be real, that always fucks things up. lol

Anyways, I guess the only other thing I have to say is how freaking excited I am for this move. It’s simply the right time. All my family is in SD, I love my community and friends there, I love the lifestyle and vibe…it’s just me. 

View from Julian

What is also exciting (and at times induces mild panic until I remind myself to practice what I preach) is the fact that this is a completely blank, new chapter. I have an outline of what I want and know my life will be like, but it’s completely open and blank. I’m moving down to SD on December 7th and, as of now, that’s all I’ve got. My life is in my hands. Completely open to my design and I can create whatever I wish. It’s new and fresh and waiting to be transformed in ways that I want and know, and in ways I don’t yet know. It’s so exciting! Not scary at all. Yes, maybe a little stressful when I start over-thinking it all…but mainly exciting because it’s such a fresh new “beginning” (or continuation?) and San Diego is really where I want to be. I think I’ll be able to breathe a sigh of relief when I finally land in the place I know I am meant to be.

IMG_6833And with that, I’m going to finish my coffee and pumpkin bread and get ready for Halloweeeeeeeeeen! I’m going to be a cat :) Well, let’s be real, a slutty cat. Classily slutty. If that’s a thing. LOL

Finding Yourself: It’s An Inside Job

Spiritual Badass

Lindsey in SevillaI have a chronic fear of being stuck. As in, this (relationship, career, home, job, city, environment) is sucking my soul and how will I ever get out of it?

Up until “adulthood” (aka post-graduate life), most of us live in the distinct time frame of a school year. Semesters, quarters, summer breaks…if a class is miserable, you know you’ll be done with it in December. If your roommate and apartment suck, you know you can move at the end of the semester. The chapters are short. There is always an end date.

But after graduation, at least for me, it was a wide-open expansive land of time and I guess it freaked me out more than I thought. I’m always afraid of being “stuck.”

Physically, in a relationship, a career, a city, in a certain environment. It’s not fear of commitment. Hell, I’ll 150% commit to something I believe in and if I think it’s a good thing. But it’s “stuck” in the sense of believing there is no way out of a situation that drains me of energy, positivity, passion and strength. A stagnant, negative relationship. A energy draining, anxiety-filled job. Scares the crap out of me if I ever think of getting stuck in either of those things.

But at the same time I have to laugh at myself. If I ever got myself in those situations, I get the hell out. I’m just that kind of person.

So what am I afraid of?

Being vulnerable enough to stay put for more than 6-months and see what happens? Being at peace and open to whatever the Universe brings me, whether that’s tomorrow or in 5 months? 

It’s the no-end-date lifestyle that I need to get used to. In the past, I probably forced those end dates a little too soon and a little too often. I would get restless and scared that I wasn’t going anywhere or that I didn’t know what I wanted to do…so I would try and solve that by moving. Again.

Spiritual BadassI feel as though part of my restlessness is coming from the false sense of security I get when I move to a different city or job or apartment. I think that by picking up and moving, everything will be figured out. I’ll have left my problems and emotional angst in the last city. I’ll be in the right place…finally. I’ll find my true purpose…finally. 

But it doesn’t work like that.

I realize that when I have those emotions to pick up and leave, to travel and explore (if I got a dollar for all the times I went on Hipmunk to find the cheapest plane ticket to Spain, I could pay for the damn ticket), it’s because I’m outwardly searching for answers I can only find on the inside. It’s a sign that I need to explore inwardly to find what I’m attempting to discover while on those daring, romantic adventures. I need to explore what is currently and presently surrounding me. Be present and real with it in that moment.

I’m where I am for a reason. The Universe is giving me all the tools to “find myself” right where I am. So by drastically shifting and moving my environment to “find myself,” I prolong the whole experience. Because finding yourself isn’t really a destination. It’s an everyday journey that we’re continually on. Yes, I believe one day we can discover our higher purposes and innate reason for being, but until then, finding ourself is being present with ourself. Where we are in that moment.

So as romantic as it sounds to “find myself” in a small cafe at the end of a winding cobblestone street in Italy or on a sunny beach in Greece…I’m not going to find myself any more than I would at the coffee shop down my street. Certainly, I can have grand discoveries or epiphanies or light-bulb moments while in those dreamy places, but it’s not going to lead me any closer to that forever elusive thing I’m trying to find.

Maybe if I stop searching, I won’t need to find anything. The answers are always here anyways.

Transportation for a Badass

Transportation for a badass
Pearl

Mr. Pearly Birdie

First off, Pearly bird wanted to say “hello!”

“Sometimes your only available transportation is a leap of faith.” – Margaret Shepard

You have to take that leap of faith out of your comfort zone in order to make any changes in your current situation or to welcome any transformation into your life.

Yes, it can be scary. But I’d rather take a “leap of faith” that turns out to be a dud than walk around the rest of my life wondering “What if…?” At the very least you learn something about you and/or the world, right? Life is an adventure. It’s a story YOU write yourself.

So be daring, you badass and take that leap of faith into the next chapter of your life, you know, the one you *really* want to pursue.

We create these stories in our head that the whole world will collapse if we take that scary next step…like we’ll lose our friends, our parents won’t approve, we will lose our money, we’ll regret the decision the second we’ll make it, we will fail, our birds will hate us….we’ve all had those stories take up valuable real-estate in our minds.

Those are cute stories, but that’s just what they are: STORIES. Not reality. STORIES. Write yourself a new story, one that is filled with lots of success (whatever that word means to YOU), celebration, dreams manifesting, people cheering, an abundance of money and friends, and one where your birdie always loves you. Hold this new story and vision close to your heart and mind as you take that leap of faith.

You’ll realize it wasn’t that scary after all.

If you need support in re-writing your story, talk to me! It’s my passion and purpose to help support badasses like you through these transition, story-rewriting times in your life. I want you to be the best version of YOU. <3 Set up a complimentary 30-minute call with me here to see how I can support you: https://calendly.com/lindseyoconnor

Never allow waiting to become a habit

never-allow-waiting-to-become-a-habit-live-your-dreams-and-take-risks-life-is-happening-nowI’ve made some bold, out-of-the-box moves in the last several years. Whether it’s a literal move to different cities/countries for a time or certain personal decisions I’ve made in my life. I felt something in my gut, listened to my intuition, followed it, made it happen and a short whirlwind later, I was living it.

There was this freedom and expansion initially and then there was always that feeling of “Oh. My. God. What the hell was I thinking?!?! Nope. I want to go back. Go back, go back, go back. This is scary and I have NO idea what I’m doing.” (I mean, moving to Spain for 4 months on my own when I knew no one and spoke very little Spanish? Talk about scary, vulnerable shit. LOL)

But then I moved past those feelings. The flailing as I free fall, thinking I’m way over my head. I kept calm and carried on because, in my mind, I had no other choice. Once outside of my comfort zone, going back is not an answer.

Sitting scared shitless outside of my comfort zone was and is my “plan.” Because I know allowing myself to feel that discomfort and work through it, exploring and discovering in that heightened, sensitive state will make living even more magical and real. I’ll learn about my world and myself even more.

I have a fear of being stuck, of waiting for too long and never being able to do something again, whether it’s travel, work, experiences, moves, etc…That I would one day look back and regret I didn’t do something when I had the chance.

This is a good and bad thing I guess.

Although, I’ve had to learn that I need to weed out the “gut feelings” that are actually coming from a place of fear and insecurity, rather than actual intuition. I used to think that by changing my external environment, I’d be able to take care of an internal insecurity or issue. That by moving to a different location, it would magically be gone. Poof. But it only served to suppress whatever issue it was, only to have it come out again in my new environment.

Don't let life happen to youAll the moves I’ve made though, whether subtle or mildly drastic, have all shaped the person I am today. Stretched me. Made me grow, personally, professionally, as a friend, daughter, partner and coach. I was forced to face some of my inner demons head on in order to make it through those vulnerable moments. Even if there were scary times at the beginning, I never regretted what I learned. I never regretted my experiences and choices.

Don’t wait for life to happen to you. Or for life to just simply go by. Do something to create the life, environment and changes you want and need. Ones that will support you and your higher purpose and passions. Take action. Go for it. Go. Do. Don’t wait. Life is happening NOW. Enjoy it, because it’s yours.

When It’s Ok to Ditch “The Plan”

Granada

Granada“Friends and partners to celebrate life with, abundance to enhance any adventure, and mountains to perch atop, Lindsey, all arrive when you dwell upon the celebration, the adventure, and the view. Not names, lotteries, or the path you think wisest. Yes, Lindsey, you can have whatever you want, anything. Just don’t confuse what you want with how you’re going to get it.” –The Universe

THAT LAST LINE THOUGH. Once again, The Universe popping his/her/its(?) sweet head in my email inbox with a reminder to not focus on HOW to make things happen.

Focus on the WHAT, and the HOW will come to you.

And I’m pretty certain the path you take to get to your WHAT will be full of unicorns, baby animals, organic dark chocolate growing from trees and a free membership to the wine club of your choice and Uptown Funk playing on repeat.

Or maybe that’s just me….

Do you ever get caught up in the HOW to make things happen? So much that it hinders you from actually doing anything productive to reach your goals? Your dreams?

It holds us back from taking action to actualize our dreams because we think we need to first figure out HOW we’re going to make it happen…that we first need to figure out a very detailed plan and THEN we can start doing.

Screw that. That’s a one-way express ticket to Stagnant-Do-Nothingville.

Just DO. It doesn’t matter if you don’t have a clue HOW you’re going to make your WHAT happen.

If you start to take action in ways that feel aligned with your soul and higher purpose, and take actions that make you a little scared (that means you’re outside of your comfort zone- huzzah!), the HOW will appear and the path to your what will become more clear.

Take that first step. Doesn’t matter what it is. But take it. Even a little baby step will make a significant impact. And it will also tell The Universe you’re not screwing around anymore and you’re ready to receive more clarity on your HOW.

What step will you take today!? Share in the comments below!!

Are you unsure of what step to take? Talk to me!! We’ll figure it out together. #badassteamwork